1. Love is made of many components. What are your top three components of love?Now that’s a good question that maybe i’ll dig deep into instead of just giving you a superficial surface answer. Love is so very complicated and as we grow it evolves. There’s also question of loving someone and being in love with someone. There’s layers and depth to love. I could give my three in the perfect world fantasy components or I could give my more realistic components.
Fantasy List – There is only one competent of love that I think isn’t necessarily attainable as adults so for me that fits into the category of fantasy/ perfect world…that component is Unconditional. The thing that I love the most about children is that they are the earthly form and example of the purest love….unconditional love. Children make my heart smile because there innocence and ability to love flaws without question makes them a joy. Children will give there parents unconditional love – they don’t care if mom is a drug addict or dad doesn’t have a job or mom is a pole dancer or dad is a murderer. When the door to their home opens the children will give the biggest hugs and kisses with bundles of love to those parents. It isn’t until they’ve grown and experienced deep pain, heart break, back stabbing, fear and a whole boatload of emotions that comes with life does it change. As adults I don’t know that we have the ability to love unconditionally….because will you still love and stay with your cheating spouse if you’re monogamous, will you love and stay with them if they try to harm you, will you love and stay with them if they become addicted to drugs and steal all of your stuff etc . Maybe once, maybe twice , maybe even ten times but I think that you have to find a very special person who will love you when you are at your lowest potentially sitting in a jail cell for committing treason and at your highest point of success. I’m sure you can think of something right now that would cause you to leave the person you love..that’s a condition. The other thing about unconditional love is that it comes with a component of unselfishness. There is a selflessness that adults struggle with. I know adults are capable of unconditional love when it comes to children. I always question if unconditional love is tangible as adults in romantic relationships? Up until recently I thought maybe it wasn’t…but that’s a story for another day 🙂
Realistic List – 1. Trust – I know trust would seem like not a huge thing but the question is how many people do you truly trust. I need trust as a component of love. I need to trust that person with my deepest desires, most embarrassing mistakes and heartbreaking challenges. I need to trust that judgement won’t harshly be passed. I need to trust that if that love ends the broken pieces that I shared wont be spoken to another or smeared on a canvas like paint for the world to see. I need to trust that when i’m being held tight and in my most vulnerable intimate moments that i’m not being used or stabbed in the back.
2. Care Bear – I’m a tough cookie to crack so I need someone who is understanding for love. It takes a lot to truly get to know me and even after that point I can have my days both good and bad. A care bear is someone caring and understanding. I need understanding as a component of love. I need someone who is willing to listen and be patient because sometimes I just want to talk without looking for a particular outcome. I need understanding because sometimes my anxiety gets the best of me. I need understanding because it helps to bring me out of my shell and gives me one less thing to worry about in this crazy thing called life. I’m a delicate flower that requires a certain amount of care to thrive.
3. Passion & Intimacy- As kinky as I am, I am equally passionate and sensual. There’s something about the little intimate details that satisfies my soul. I need passion as a component of love. Passion in intimacy keeps me going in the wonderful world of sex. And sex I do enjoy 🙂 I could have boat loads of sex but I need that passion and when I don’t feel it..I miss and crave it. I need the few moments to just smell my lovers skin (like a serial killer as Wicked would say lol). I need to run my hands through hair and rest my head on a shoulder as the sweat drips down my face while I ride. I need the intimate moments of just sitting on a lap and massaging various parts in a non sexual way. I need that excited passionate feeling that fills my stomach when I see that special someones face. I enjoy showers together not for sex but for the intimacy and private talks. I never want to lose passion and intimacy in love – it should come with the package.
2. For you what is good sex, and what is great sex? Good sex is sex that leaves me satisfied but not much past that. It’s sex that physically feels good and scratches that itch. It’s not always sex that ends with orgasm because you can have good sex without an orgasm. Great sex is sex that physically feels good and mentally is stimulating. Great sex is exploratory sex with a partner whose not afraid to try new things and push you to your limits. Great sex is really dependent your specific needs – so great sex for me could be really kinky adventurous sex and great sex for you could be slow and steady. Neither is wrong 🙂
3. In long-term unions do you: a. expect love to grow over time as the union unfolds? b. need to have immediate attraction, infatuation, and feelings or excitement in order to enter into a long-term union I think its a little bit of both – you want that attraction and feelings of excitement in the beginning. Its those fun things that make dating in the beginning good but I also think that love grows over time – everyone doesn’t love at the same pace. So you could love someone and they may not be to that point of those feelings with you yet because it takes time. And then they may be in love with you and you haven’t reach that point yet. If its meant to be it shall be.
4. You are away on your dream vacation…– Are you alone or with someone? Who? I’m definitely going with someone, the more the merrier. I’d have to take the Wicked one.
– Do you want to have a hookup with a sexy stranger? Is the sexy stranger female, male, gender-fluid, bi-gender, transgender? No I don’t want any random stranger hook up sex because I’d go with someone fully capable of fulfilling all of my sexual needs. Why take the risk if you know for sure what you can get 🙂
– Would you rather spend all day doing your favorite vacation activity OR spend all night having kinky sex? Can I have a little bit of both….I want the best of both worlds. Maybe start the morning with some kinky play, leave the vacation spot with a remote control toy inside or rope under my clothes and spend the day doing my favorite activities. After all the activities are done shower, eat, nap and spend the rest of the evening with kinky play.
5. Is hot, steamy, all your wildest fantasies come true sex more likely to happen with your current lover or a sexy, no-strings attached stranger? It’s most likely to happen with my current lover – the kinkier one for sure .
Bonus: Describe your hot, steamy all your wildest fantasies come true sex? I’ll have to keep that my own little secret.
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Happy TMI Tuesday!